In today’s captivating episode, you will be inspired by the remarkable journey of Sgt. Christine Brite, a trailblazer in law enforcement and an advocate for resilience, as host Lorie Jones sits down with her, discussing Christine’s fascinating career from sergeant to licensed therapist for military veterans and first responders.
Christine challenges the notion of simply enduring and instead highlights the power in knowing when to step back and recharge, with insights on maintaining balance, self-care, and strategic energy management.
Whether it’s balancing a high-stress career with motherhood and family life or navigating the challenges of being a woman in a male-dominated field, Christine’s wisdom is sure to inspire young women forging their paths. Tune in to discover how she proves that courage and compassion can go hand in hand in achieving extraordinary success.
Show Highlights:
- Sgt. Christine Brite’s career journey and twofold triumphs with her husband shot in the line of duty. [04:45]
- Get an inside view of walking the line as a female prison officer. [11:28]
- What’s the balance between self-care and resilience? [14:28]
- Where to step back from the pangs of caregiver syndrome. [17:57]
- The art of receiving advice and using the wisdom of hindsight. [20:19]
- What adjustments can working moms make to prioritize time with their children? [26:43]
- The power of embracing open-mindedness early. [30:02]
- Unlock tactical mindset skills from female police sergeant training to elevate your career. [33:26]
- Discover the challenges and strengths of women in law enforcement. [40:06]
- Empowering advice for young women to craft their paths and tribes. [47:17]
To connect with Christine Brite, email her at cbrite@gmail.com.
If you enjoyed this episode, please go to Apple Podcasts and leave a review!
For more information about Lorie Jones, go to https://fearlessfinancialadvisors.com/fearless-females.
00:00.86
Lorie Jones
Good morning, fearless females. I'm really excited today. Today we have Christine Bright on her program. She is a sergeant for the Douglas County Sheriff's Office. She's a first responder and a military veteran therapist, and she is so interesting. I've had a chance to chat with Christine over the last several months, and I'm really excited for you to hear her story. Thank you so much for doing this for us, Christine.
00:24.61
Christine Brite
Thank you for having me. It is a pleasure.
00:28.03
Lorie Jones
So we'll get started with my favorite question. I'm a reader. I love reading anything and everything. What's your favorite?
00:36.03
Christine Brite
Wow. i um I have so many books that are like just sitting there saying, please read me. um and i And I kind of run the gamut. I tend to gravitate towards the nonfiction books, kind of the real life mysteries or crimes.
00:53.95
Christine Brite
um which, you know, kind of comes into my my characteristic and culture of of who I've been as in my career. But lately, I have really been gravitating towards psychology books and learning about kind of the mind and how people work. um I really enjoy the book called struggle wealth. And it is essentially about how we all deal with our struggles in life because everybody has a struggle. um Whether that be big or small or whatever it is, it's your struggle and how to be resilient through it and push through it. ah It's based loosely, well, I wouldn't say loosely, it's based on veterans within the military. However, it also you know coincides with first responders and nurses and teachers and moms and dads and
01:48.82
Christine Brite
you name it, and so it is um it casts a wide net over our communities.
01:54.49
Lorie Jones
Yeah, I think that's neat. I think that's kind of interesting. I i um had a coworker once that was a trained psychiatrist and sat like a couple of seats back from me in in a and I used to love to listen to him talk to clients because I think there's a special set of skills that comes with that so I can see why you're interested in those sorts of things. That's a good suggestion. Thank you.
02:18.92
Christine Brite
You're welcome.
02:20.78
Lorie Jones
So tell me a little bit about your journey. How did you get where you're at today? Where did you start? um What do you do? Just kind of a little bit about you.
02:30.62
Christine Brite
Sure. Well, I um i am currently 47 years old. I'm proud to say that because I have had quite the experience in life. But um I grew up in Littleton, Colorado, um here just right down the road, went to Littleton High School to two wonderful parents who I attribute ah them giving me a wonderful sense of work culture. um they've They've provided for me you know all the way up to me kind of growing my own wings and flying away from the nest. And um they they really imparted in me ah the integrity and the morality that I needed and the values um to be a really you know decent human which is nice, right? That's always something that we strive for. I ended up in Castle Rock, which is where I live currently. And I started at the Douglas County Sheriff's Office at a young age. I was about 23 years old when I decided, um you know, I think maybe I want to be a police officer. And ah I had thought about it for some time. My dad was in the military. He was in the Vietnam War, and he had always um
03:46.34
Christine Brite
Uh, talked about how interesting it was. And it wasn't until I watched a friend who went through a police academy, it was like a video that they had at the Las Vegas Metro police academy. Uh, we went to his graduation and I watched this video and I'm like, that is what I want to do. Um, you know, it wasn't quite the military, but it was quasi military where I can still, you know, be around my family, be here and, um,
04:13.06
Christine Brite
serve my community, whatever that looked like. And so at 23, I decided to um go through the police academy. I was hired on by Douglas County Sheriff's Office. And um I quickly went into the position of a deputy sheriff in the jail. So I worked the jail population for almost three years, very interesting,
04:37.12
Christine Brite
ah very unique being a 20-something year old in that kind of environment. um Very intimidating. It was exciting. it was I learned a lot. Let's just say that. I learned how to speak to people because um that type of population, ah you know, weren't always ah people who you want to engage with in everyday life. And so I started there. I quickly kind of moved through the ranks. of i I worked in um Our Park Meadows Mall at the time was owned by Douglas County, and so I worked there, and that was really my stepping stone to go into an investigation spot. I was simultaneously um having a family. I had met my husband in 2003, or in 2000, and we married in 2003, and then we had our first daughter in 2007. So things were kind of just moving along. I went to investigations. i
05:37.00
Christine Brite
I ended up staying in investigations for 17 long years, a very wonderful time.
05:41.55
Lorie Jones
Wow.
05:43.53
Christine Brite
I worked in the capacity of the Special Victims Unit, which is child crimes and internet crimes against children. And I moved to persons crimes, which is homicides, domestic violence, assaults, anything having to do with people.
05:59.58
Christine Brite
And then I promoted in 2016.
06:05.10
Christine Brite
Then in 2016, my husband is also a police officer.
06:10.95
Lorie Jones
Hmm. Hmm.
06:11.38
Christine Brite
So he um he was working at the Douglas County Sheriff's Office as well. He subsequently was shot in the lane of duty in 2016 in September.
06:21.98
Christine Brite
He sustained pretty severe injuries with which left him paralyzed. And now on top of being this mom and this this detective, um I was now a caregiver.
06:34.07
Christine Brite
And we had some struggles and challenges during that time and moved through those over the years. I became a supervisor ah in investigations and then quickly moved out back to patrol.
06:43.66
Lorie Jones
Mm hmm.
06:49.16
Christine Brite
And that is kind of where I am now. i'm During that time, I also, crazy as it seems, had this epiphany that I really wanted to get a higher education.
07:01.88
Christine Brite
So as write up I know, right? um ah Around the time my husband was shot in the line of duty, I was getting my undergrad degree. um And that was in organizational leadership.
07:14.71
Christine Brite
um I really felt that the leadership portion of it was um important for for many reasons, right? Just the the communication and um just being able to be motivated and motivating other people.
07:26.75
Christine Brite
ah And then ah I finally finished that, it took
07:26.56
Lorie Jones
Mmhmm.
07:31.19
Christine Brite
a very long time. And that was okay, right? I was an adult, I was a much better adult student than I ever was a child student. So got through that. And then in 2020, my husband had this another epiphany to say, let's go back to school and My mind was like, no, no, please no.
07:52.40
Lorie Jones
ah
07:52.64
Christine Brite
But my heart told me, yes, you you got to do this. And this time, it was a different career path. And it was in psychology to be able to inspire others ah to have resilience through their struggles and to be able to find pathways and journeys.
08:14.09
Christine Brite
And so now today, We also, so I serve as a therapist at Code 4 counseling. It's specific to first responders, military, and all of their families.
08:27.01
Christine Brite
um So I have a double duty now as a police officer and a therapist. That's kind of my story in a nutshell.
08:32.95
Lorie Jones
Well, it.
08:34.49
Christine Brite
It's a crazy life.
08:36.04
Lorie Jones
That is, that's crazy. And and not only um those two careers, but a mom and a wife and and taking on some community roles as well, right?
08:49.63
Christine Brite
Absolutely. Now, when I met my husband, he had a child from a previous marriage, she was five at the time. So she is my daughter. um You know, I mean, she was a baby when we first met. So we do have two children. um Now they are 27 and 17. But yeah, we i would we were raising kids during this time, we still had a household to fulfill. I was a wife, I was a sister, you know, I was all those things while still trying to pursue even more.
09:18.88
Lorie Jones
Yeah.
09:23.88
Lorie Jones
That's crazy. That is a lot of hats to wear. So I'm sure as we get through some of these questions, you're going to give us some insight as to how to make that all work. um It sounds, sounds exhausting.
09:35.80
Christine Brite
Yeah.
09:37.07
Lorie Jones
Honestly, I'm not even going to lie. It sounds exhausting, but exciting.
09:40.40
Christine Brite
Do you see the bags under my eyes?
09:42.50
Lorie Jones
oh Yeah, yeah. So tell me a little bit about this. um At 23 years old, you're working in a prison and I'm sure there were probably not a whole lot of young ladies working in that prison. You said it taught you how to talk to people. You couldn't have, I mean you, that couldn't have been an easy situation. Tell me about that a little bit.
10:09.85
Christine Brite
Well, it wasn't. um and Even to this day, and you can imagine 22 years ago, 23 years ago, ah the the the ah women women were not really in the role of police officers. We're still very much the underdog in law enforcement. And being so young and had no experience with really life, um I was kind of thrust into this.
10:38.51
Christine Brite
i it was It was hard, it was difficult. I think um in some some capacities it was easier because ah I had my fellow brothers on one side kind of helping me and then um and and and treating me like I was a sister.
10:51.99
Lorie Jones
Oops.
10:57.91
Christine Brite
And then on the other side, I had you know inmates that I had to work with as well. And that was probably the most difficult part. um Getting catcalled.
11:09.27
Christine Brite
I learned quickly that I could not wear perfume. um I couldn't um wear my hair in a certain way because I would be definitely called out by the male inmates. And so I had to act differently, quite honestly. um I had to be a little bit more hardened. I couldn't be as soft skinned soft-skinned as um I had come going in. And I've learned that a little bit along the way.
11:35.94
Christine Brite
I also felt that um just the profession in general, that being a woman, um you know the question was, can you take care of yourself?
11:46.91
Christine Brite
You're so petite and you're so small, you're not strong enough. And so I had to prove myself a lot of it.
11:50.76
Lorie Jones
Mm hmm.
11:53.65
Christine Brite
um And there was like a other couple women that went along with with me and we've we've talked along the way. I mean, even from the uniform we we wear, it's a male uniform.
12:05.53
Christine Brite
um ah all Everything about men and women is is different in our physiques. We know that. um But even the uniform didn't change over the years. um And so they had to modify that a little bit so we could perform our duties comfortably. But that that took a quite a bit of time to get through to acclimate and understand that I can do this. And I saw it as a challenge.
12:34.00
Christine Brite
And so I wasn't gonna back down and I love a challenge. And ah it it was um it was definitely an interesting piece to also learning not only who I am, but how to speak to people, how to actually talk to people. Because in the prison, in the jails, you don't have any um weapons. You can't bring a Taser. We we didn't have Tasers back then, but you can't bring a Taser. You can't bring an Asp. You can't have a ah weapon at all.
13:01.72
Christine Brite
So your best weapon is your mouth and how to speak and talk to people. um And that's really how I started learning, okay, I can probably do more damage with me just speaking than I ever can with my hands or any kind of of weapon. So yeah, that was kind of my intro to law enforcement. It was ah it was a painful road for a couple of years, but I got through it.
13:34.68
Christine Brite
Uh oh, I think Lori, are you offline?
14:02.69
Lorie Jones
Are you there? Sorry, my internet timed out for just a minute. So, um, that, that I, I, yeah, I just connected to a different, I just connected to a different hotspot and hopefully that'll, it usually does work.
14:08.56
Christine Brite
Uh-oh, yep, I see you now.
14:17.69
Lorie Jones
So hopefully, um, so, okay.
14:20.45
Christine Brite
Okay, you're a little choppy just so you know.
14:25.40
Lorie Jones
Yeah. Um,
14:29.18
Lorie Jones
Hopefully the the other one is is down for some reason. um Let me try connecting again.
14:41.29
Christine Brite
Okay.
14:46.71
Lorie Jones
Okay, is that better?
14:48.19
Christine Brite
Yes, much better.
14:48.91
Lorie Jones
Okay, okay, good. So, all right, perfect. um So, Christine, talk a little bit about the best investment that you made in yourself.
15:00.83
Lorie Jones
Is there something that you can look back over your journey and just say, oh my goodness, if I hadn't done that, I really don't think I'd be where I'm at today.
15:07.43
Christine Brite
Hmm.
15:14.59
Christine Brite
I don't know if it was an investment necessarily. um I just had this internal fortitude, this intrinsic motivation to forge forward. I've always had it. There was nothing that was going to set me back. Now, granted, I will tell you there have been days, right? Like, I'm not getting out of bed today. And that's OK. I would say that maybe taking care of myself um was really important during this time, self-care, and I still believe that today. um If there's you know time that I need to step back and say, you know what, I'm gonna not work out today, or I'm just gonna lounge around and and read a book, um that is self-care to me. And so being able to take that step back and say, I just, I need to
16:11.30
Christine Brite
re-energize myself and recharge. um I have this meme that I always put up on when I teach classes. And it's of a person who's kind of drained, and then there's a battery with a phone battery, right?
16:27.05
Christine Brite
And it says, you know, the phone battery is at 10%. And it said, you would never let your phone get at 10%. Why would you allow yourself to? And so I always remember that.
16:35.27
Lorie Jones
Mm hmm.
16:36.79
Christine Brite
And I have to remember that I need to be give my best every day. And sometimes that's not easy. But if I can take small steps along the way to, like I said, recharge and reenergize myself in whatever way that looks, then I can move forward and give that 100% every day.
16:59.60
Lorie Jones
I think that's really powerful and is as busy as you were, like, you know, going to school and working and raising kids and all of the things all at the same time. Maybe that's the secret. Maybe you have to take that time out to recharge your own batteries, like put on your own oxygen mask first in order to make it because I, I'm like in awe, like how did you make it through that?
17:26.81
Christine Brite
It was a blur, Lori. It was a blur.
17:29.23
Lorie Jones
that so But yeah, but I think the idea of taking taking time to just take some take a step back and being willing to say, hey, today is the day I need to take a little bit of rest time um and making that a priority.
17:47.83
Christine Brite
Yeah, and who best knows you except you, right? If your body is telling you, hey, my knee hurts today, or I have a headache, or whatever it may be, listen to your body. um And though, you know, things are gonna still pass you by, right? You still have the appointments, you still have the kids, you still have all the things, and that's okay. um It's just prioritizing, um and you should be top of the list of that prioritization.
18:20.87
Lorie Jones
I kind of want to emphasize that because I think that as women we put ourselves a lot of times near the bottom of the list. Like we'll give and give and give and we don't give ourselves that priority to say I need to take care of me so that I can continue taking care of everything that I'm asked to handle. And I i like that you said that you're at the top of that list of priorities.
18:44.91
Christine Brite
You know, um I read a book recently, and it's called Stress, Stressed. It's a women's book um about why women become so stressed. And it's by, I believe her name is Emily um Oh, goodness.
19:03.25
Christine Brite
It's two two two sisters that actually wrote this book. And I'm sorry, I don't remember their names. But they talk about caregiver syndrome.
19:10.27
Lorie Jones
That's fine.
19:13.03
Christine Brite
And this syndrome is um typical with women. ah You know, women take on a lot of the load of not only themselves, but other people.
19:24.05
Christine Brite
um We're great empathizers, we're great sympathizers. And And over the years, even if you think hundreds of years ago, women are taking care of the families, right? We're caregivers, we're caretakers. And so we want to give, we want to give. And then this giver syndrome um really um and but is embedded with all most women. And we can't shake it. And so we're like, how do we shake this? And the number one strategy is movement, is physical movement. Whether that means that you go out and walk, you go to the mailbox, you
19:58.76
Christine Brite
ah walk around your your kitchen while you're talking on the phone, um it is to get that tension out. Well, that is also self-help. That is also allowing yourself to have that kind of freedom to just like get through and recharge. And without that, like you said,
20:20.67
Christine Brite
putting the oxygen mask on first, if you don't have that oxygen, you're gonna be depleted. You cannot help your next person. You can't help your child, your husband, your coworkers.
20:31.53
Christine Brite
And so you you need to be responsible for your own kind of mental health, physical health, ah because nobody else is gonna take that on for you.
20:43.68
Christine Brite
And so being able to do that is half the battle.
20:43.93
Lorie Jones
yeah
20:47.33
Lorie Jones
Yeah, 100%. I agree. I think that, and and knowing that it's it's your responsibility to, like that it's your responsibility to take care of that for you and and say, hey, I need a break. And being okay with with raising your hand and saying, hey, you know what? It's too much right now. I just, I need to take a step back. I need to.
21:10.06
Lorie Jones
My favorite is watch Netflix for five hours straight. Something totally brainless.
21:14.78
Christine Brite
Yes.
21:17.89
Lorie Jones
So ah yeah.
21:18.30
Christine Brite
those are the one Those are the best days. Are you kidding me?
21:21.69
Lorie Jones
yeah So tell me, did you ever get some really bad advice or what is the worst advice you've ever gotten? And did you take it or did you not take it? Did you learn from it?
21:35.58
Christine Brite
Bad advice. um I mean, I think that bad advice comes and goes ah a lot of times. um i can I honestly don't know. I can't give you an example of one specific advice that I i got that was bad. I will tell you this. Over the years, I've gotten advice from lots of people, right? Parents, co-workers, leaders, ah friends. And i didn't maybe I didn't know it was bad advice when I was in the middle of it, right? And maybe I learned it along the way, like, ooh, this is not bad advice.
22:11.73
Christine Brite
But one thing I did recognize is that whichever way, whether it was good or bad, as it was coming in, i I took that and I decided I'm not going to do that again. Right. So if I made that mistake of taking that bad advice and doing that thing, and it came out poorly and I'm like, Ooh, that was ugly.
22:35.55
Christine Brite
I assured myself that I'm not walking that path again. I got my hand burned on the stove and I don't like it and I'm not going to put my hand back there again. um So I really am mindful of those types those um things when when people are, you know, social media has, you know, obviously exploded over it.
22:57.20
Christine Brite
i You and I are probably very unique because we grew up in an era with landline phones, right? And we had the coiled phone that was attached to the wall.
23:03.44
Lorie Jones
Oh, yeah.
23:05.31
Christine Brite
And right and then we had cordless phones.
23:06.65
Lorie Jones
and
23:08.18
Christine Brite
We're like, mom, can we have a cordless phone? They're like, sure, you can have a cordless phone. And now you can walk around the house. But you can't get too far. And then the pagers, and then the cell phones, and all the things.
23:14.37
Lorie Jones
Yeah.
23:17.66
Christine Brite
Well, you know now social media is here. And it's fairly new still. We're still kind of learning about it. And this is where people get hung up because they You never know what's real and what's not real.
23:29.93
Christine Brite
And so with social media, though again, I can't think of a time that I've actually like click here, you're gonna win a million dollars, right?
23:29.81
Lorie Jones
who
23:37.80
Christine Brite
i I would never click.
23:38.05
Lorie Jones
Yeah.
23:39.91
Christine Brite
I'm always trying to be nonjudgmental, but with an open mind, but I also am a cop too, right? So I have a little bit of cynicism like, is this a scam?
23:48.51
Lorie Jones
Yeah.
23:49.69
Christine Brite
Is this really right? So I would encourage women just to go down the right path um that they think is right at the time with the information that's given to them. Common sense goes a long way, right?
24:01.56
Christine Brite
If you think that it's probably a bad idea, it's probably a bad idea. And again, learning from it at the end of the day is going to be half the battle.
24:07.66
Lorie Jones
yeah
24:12.24
Christine Brite
So when you become in your 40s or your 50s, you'd be like, I remember that time and I am not going near that again.
24:20.79
Lorie Jones
Is there a way that you like you took stock or you looked at what had happened and you're like, oh, that was a bad experience. Is there a way that you kind of like systematized sort of looking at those experiences? Because I've i've heard that that's really valuable. It's to go back and do like an after,
24:39.12
Lorie Jones
even a personal after action report or whatever you want to call that thing.
24:46.45
Christine Brite
Yeah, I mean, I think definitely during the moment is really critical. like So that critical thinking time of you know just internally going, OK, this is what I'm hearing. This is my input. um What are the challenges to you know whatever I'm about to do? And what are the benefits? And now I'm all about taking risk. My motto is is that I will ask for forgiveness later.
25:12.99
Christine Brite
and and do now, but I have to also know that I'm doing it for the right reasons. And so my critical thinking comes into place, and I literally put it in two categories, kind of kind of the good and the bad, and which one outweighs it. And then um I make that decision, whatever that looks like. But then afterward, and let's say I've made the the decision and it and it turned turned horribly wrong, and you know it's at work, and um You know, I have now a boss coming to me and telling me, hey, you made the wrong decision and now we have to do A, B, C, D. Well, all along while I'm licking my wounds, um you know, because i I made the wrong decision, um I am learning and thinking to myself, how can I get better? And so I may actually jot down notes. I have a notepad that I usually keep with me um for all my communications and leadership.
26:08.64
Christine Brite
just things along the way that I hear or maybe that I do or somebody else does that i I like or I don't like. We all have somebody in our lives, especially like our bosses, and you're like, I'm not going to be like that guy, right? I don't like the way that guy does A, B, or C. Or I'm going to be like that guy or that gal. And I love how she does this. I take those And I put him kind of into a hope chest, if you will, and I write those down. And I try to ah strive to be a little bit better every day at those things. And then the things I don't like, I kind of put those in the fire, right? And I ah try not to allow those to kind of come in, but I know that they're there. I don't want to completely get rid of them. I need to know that they're there because when the next time comes around and I'm thinking, is this a good idea or a bad idea?
27:05.20
Christine Brite
I can go, Oh, that one's in the fire over there. I don't want to have anything part of that, right? That's too risky. Um, and so that's kind of how I do the self-reflection thing.
27:10.41
Lorie Jones
Yeah.
27:14.02
Christine Brite
And everybody should be doing self-reflection, especially after, um, some kind of incident or, um, like you said, a decision was made, whether it's good or bad. Um, not to, not to burden yourself too much with, Oh, I made a horrible choice and I made a horrible decision.
27:33.30
Christine Brite
um The fact is, is we make mistakes. All of us make mistakes.
27:36.44
Lorie Jones
And.
27:37.46
Christine Brite
And it's how you rise up from that mistake that's going to to show ah that you are able to grow within um your experiences.
27:49.73
Christine Brite
And so I think that being able to do that self-reflection allows you to do that as well.
27:55.85
Lorie Jones
And I love the idea of writing down what you learn kind of like in a and it good do it again. I want to be like this and like a, these are the things I want to avoid in the future. And when, you and when you run into similar situations, because you've written it down, because you've thought about it, because you've done that after action report, you really do kind of take that learning into the future in a really systematic way.
28:18.24
Lorie Jones
I like that. I think that's cool.
28:21.33
Christine Brite
yeah
28:22.86
Lorie Jones
What about a situation that you could go back and do differently? If you had a situation through your journey that you were like, oh, if I could go back and do that, knowing what I know now, because I tend to think you never, you always will do it the same given the same information, but knowing what you know now, is there a situation you'd go back and change?
28:45.09
Christine Brite
You know, i I saw this question and I actually thought about this one. Because at first I'm like, no, I wouldn't change anything. it's My life is wonderful. It's great. um But in reality, um yeah, there were a lot of struggles. I think the biggest one, OK, I have a child who's 17 years old. She's getting ready to graduate high school. She's my baby. She's my everything. um And I feel like I missed out on a lot of stuff. And I put work first a lot of times.
29:17.69
Christine Brite
um And I wish I could have invested a little more time in her. ah When I look back, I can virtually remember every you know birthday and holiday and all the major events. ah But I wish that there were times when I said, I'm not going to stay late at work tonight. I'm not going to take that overtime. I'm not going to give myself so much. Doesn't mean I have to completely give
29:48.72
Christine Brite
up my career all the way. um But now that I'm coming out to the end of her being a child, um my mom heart is saying I probably should have um tried to be there a little bit more for her. And that was probably the biggest one that yeah I reflect on today.
30:10.00
Lorie Jones
Yeah, that's hard. that Looking back as a mom, could you have that ah drive for success and that um you want to do a good job for your employers, but you also, you're torn. I i i have five kids of my own, so I am always torn between, you know, do I take, where where do I give my energy to? And it, to be fair, Christine, it doesn't seem like, like even if you If you do the absolute perfect epitome of being a parent, um it still seems like you have that same sort of regret or guilt, like, well, maybe I could have done better.
30:49.60
Christine Brite
Yeah.
30:51.93
Lorie Jones
but
30:52.50
Christine Brite
Yeah, I feel a lot of people have this poll that When they're at work, they feel guilty because they're not at home. And then when they're at home, they feel guilty because they're not at work. And I definitely went through that struggle a lot of my years um until I started developing that sense of self-care and knowing that where I need to be right now is home. And and I mean, it it obviously helped that I had some tenure within my career to say, no, I'm not going to be in today. I'm going to take a day off and I'm going to spend that day with my daughter.
31:26.33
Christine Brite
um so So that helped a little bit. But um yeah, it's um it's ah it's a balance that I think a lot of women have in their lives. And we just have to kind of move forward and and create new memories. And that's kind of where I'm at right now in my life with her.
31:43.96
Lorie Jones
Yeah. And I think that, um, there are positives on the other side as well, because yeah, maybe you didn't spend as much time as in retrospect you would like to have spent, but she also got a really good view of her mom being very successful at her chosen profession.
32:01.57
Lorie Jones
And that is, um, you know, that gives her a good example going into her future.
32:03.45
Christine Brite
Absolutely.
32:07.21
Lorie Jones
Mom can do it. I can probably do it too.
32:11.27
Christine Brite
who yeah Yeah, that's a great perspective.
32:13.70
Lorie Jones
let's
32:16.19
Lorie Jones
If you're looking back to your 20 year old self or your 21 year 22 year old self, you specifically, if you could give yourself one piece of advice at the beginning of your journey, what would you tell yourself?
32:30.73
Christine Brite
Oh, there's so many things.
32:33.32
Lorie Jones
but
32:35.68
Christine Brite
I tell myself to keep an open mind. Be able to keep an open mind. Be curious, be compassionate. um Hold your judgments at the door. Don't don't judge people too quickly. ae A lot of people that I've encountered, whether it be, um you know, coworkers, friends, even those now that I'm on patrol, you know we and we encounter the community every day. ah I think it was quick to judgment when I was i was younger. And it was you know it was detrimental to um you know everybody that was involved. um from From perspectives now, I'm like, why did I do that? That was silly of me. I could have made a great friendship. I could have made it you know a great whatever. And um having those judgments is
33:29.22
Christine Brite
that's just There's just no peace in life when you have those those kinds of things. And being 47 now, I look back and think how silly I was to you know think one way or another. And ah I think that maybe it's due to life per life experience or you know inexperience, if you will. But yeah, I would definitely tell myself, just just be curious about people, um about things, have an open mind,
33:58.81
Christine Brite
um and and allow yourself to learn from other people.
34:05.66
Lorie Jones
Yeah, sometimes it does kind of um put a barrier in front of avenues if you, if you decide early, well, I don't have anything, they're, they're not going to add to my journey.
34:17.06
Lorie Jones
So, you know, they do their thing and I'll do mine.
34:18.19
Christine Brite
Yeah. Yep.
34:21.09
Lorie Jones
And I do think that probably is a something that you Man, teenagers knock it out of you. I can tell you that much.
34:29.72
Christine Brite
Yes, absolutely.
34:29.83
Lorie Jones
you're like At that point I start asking everyone, how did you make it through this? Tell me all your secrets.
34:39.44
Lorie Jones
so
34:39.79
Christine Brite
Well, you know, my daughter's 17 now, so around 20, you know, and and even now, you know, she'll come home, she's like, Mom, this girl said this, or this boy said this, and they did this, and I'm like, okay, first of all, mind your own business, right? Like, stay on your path, not theirs.
34:55.76
Christine Brite
um And keep an open in mind. Maybe this was going on in their life. Maybe this was going on. We don't know. So try and be non-judgmental. Just ah be compassionate about it and and do your best to um have an open mind. And so I really am um teaching her in that way to think about her actions and even her thought processes when it comes to um different different encounters she has.
35:20.47
Lorie Jones
Yeah, I like that too. I think that that um shows that like we've learned from our journey and we go back and help help those. it's It's the entire fearless females concept, but like this is what we learned.
35:33.60
Christine Brite
him
35:34.96
Lorie Jones
You can do it better than us, right? You can do this better.
35:39.01
Christine Brite
Yeah, absolutely. and And really, I think as moms, we want to make sure that our children are better than us. I think that, you know, we're we we view ourselves in a certain light, right? They view us in a certain light.
35:50.58
Christine Brite
But all we know is you can be better than me, right? Like, I want you to be better than me.
35:53.59
Lorie Jones
Yeah.
35:55.61
Christine Brite
And so how can I help you along that journey? ah Yeah, I mean, that's another giver syndrome, probably quality, just trying to give more to are are to our own children.
36:06.67
Lorie Jones
here What scared you the most when you started out in your career? And does it still scare you today or not?
36:16.15
Christine Brite
Come on, Lori, I'm a cop. Of course it's scary.
36:17.65
Lorie Jones
I know. This was such an interesting question for you.
36:24.32
Christine Brite
Yeah, oh, I was i was terrible. well I think anything in your 20s, you're terrified. Again, it goes back to lack of experience. You're you're scared of everything. um I was, yeah, i'm I'm a social person by nature. So socially, I knew I could handle it. My stature, i'm ah You know, back then I'm 5'4", 125 pounds. um You know, my my fear was definitely safety when it came to my career. I knew mentally I was able to, I was up for the challenge. I could do it. I could do the job. um But then it was that piece where, again, um you're a female in a male's profession. um You're a petite female in a male's profession.
37:13.34
Christine Brite
and you're gonna encounter a very large guy one day, or you're gonna encounter a very large woman one day, and you're gonna wanna fight you. And what do you do? And so um that's where I quickly had to adapt, not only making sure that I was quick on my feet if I needed to be, um but I needed you to be quick witted. I saw it as a mind game, right? Like I have my mouth to speak and I'm going to be witty to them, I'm going to be relatable to them, and I'm going to be able to get out of this situation with just talking.
37:50.66
Christine Brite
Now, that didn't happen all of the time. And honestly, I can tell you I've been in less than five fights ever, and they weren't really fights, right?
37:59.78
Lorie Jones
hu
38:01.94
Christine Brite
Physical fights. And so, you know, the fear of safety, the fear of the unknown, I think that was my biggest piece. i think I think I knew that my career was an open book and I had no idea where the journey was going to take me, but I was going to try everything and kind of find my own path, ah which kept me moving forward.
38:25.69
Lorie Jones
Mm-hmm.
38:27.92
Christine Brite
So that was probably the biggest scary kind of piece for me.
38:33.44
Lorie Jones
And so did you did you do the like did you do extra work to like beef up your muscles so that you can win these fights? Or did you just decide that you were going to win them intellectually so they never got to a fight? How did you battle that?
38:51.44
Christine Brite
Yeah, so being ah being a cop is just, um a lot of it is mental, right? Like this mental strife that you have, and you have to have this winner's mentality. So so during our trainings, um you know, we would have trainings, you know, back then and and you know, in the early 2000s, twice a month. And sometimes they were mental, like, you're going to win this fight, you're going to push through, even if, you know, you get shot in the arm or the leg, God forbid, you're going to push through, you have to practice all of it mentally. But then we also had practicing on the range, um manipulating our weapons, making sure we knew how the guns worked, manipulating everything that was kind of on our vests and on our
39:35.55
Christine Brite
So like our belts our duty belts. Where was everything get used to making sure that if you needed to Turn a kit right away. You were able to pull one out and put put one on yourself and so That was good for my mindset like knowing I can do this because I know how to Any any situation that comes to me I can I can overcome it um But then the training on top of that, their rest control techniques, making sure I knew how to handcuff somebody.
40:06.62
Christine Brite
If I had to take somebody down, where do I hit them if I needed to really strike them to get them down on the ground? If it was a bigger person, knowing that I am able to retreat, right?
40:18.56
Christine Brite
This is a bigger person than me. This is ah ah a six foot five guy who's a bodybuilder. I'm not fighting him, right? Now I go to a tool.
40:26.82
Lorie Jones
yeah
40:28.83
Christine Brite
So we learn all these things and as we learn them, we get better and better and better at them.
40:28.78
Lorie Jones
yeah
40:34.35
Christine Brite
So over 20, you know, five years now, I have learned the techniques, the tips and tricks that if I start speaking and sir, ma'am, is there anything I can say today to make you feel better?
40:45.82
Christine Brite
And they say no, and they start you know yelling at me or charging me. I know what the next tool is.
40:49.86
Lorie Jones
Yeah. Yeah. Mmhmm.
40:51.84
Christine Brite
So it's all about training, training your mind and training your body. And that is what life is about, right?
40:56.63
Lorie Jones
Mm hmm.
41:00.16
Christine Brite
We train all day. we You don't even realize that you're training. you know Driving a car. You didn't just get in a car one day and say, oh, I know how to drive a car. You trained for it, right?
41:11.05
Christine Brite
And then maybe you got in an accident. And maybe it was your fault. And you're like, ooh, I'm not doing that again. right That's your black and white link. I'm not touching that stove again. Okay, if we're not doing that again. But I saw how my mom breaks and she breaks hard and I don't want to be that person. right So we are training ourselves along the way in every aspect of life. And this was no different. It was just a bigger challenge um to the point where I was able to overcome it. I still have times where I'm like,
41:40.98
Christine Brite
Oh crap, where am I at? What what am I doing? Okay, I gotta prepare myself when I get there, right? um We do a lot of what ifs.
41:46.71
Lorie Jones
Yeah.
41:49.06
Christine Brite
What if this happens when I go to this hot call? What if this happens?
41:51.79
Lorie Jones
yeah
41:52.60
Christine Brite
And so while we're doing those what ifs, we're also saying, okay, if that happens, then what do I do? So we're going down rabbit holes. Our brains are always critical thinking, which I think we we all do every day in our lives.
42:02.99
Lorie Jones
Yeah.
42:08.76
Christine Brite
it's
42:08.63
Lorie Jones
yeah
42:09.24
Christine Brite
it's a natural experience that each of us experiences every day.
42:14.46
Lorie Jones
It's a good reminder, though, like, even if you are not facing a really big guy or a really big gal and, you know, trying to talk them down off a ledge, so to speak, you are facing some pretty big important presentations or um, you know, ah the weight of their retirement on your shoulders, like practicing. I don't think, I think it always has a place in your profession, no matter what you are like practicing how you're going to handle that situation and, and thinking about it and going through the steps that you're going to take, maybe going through that presentation three or four times. I think that that's, I think that's applicable over everything that you do.
42:56.17
Christine Brite
I could not agree more. I mean, just for instance, Lori, this podcast, I am sure that you know you've you had questions, right? Because you had them written up. you were ah You were very methodical and critical thinking of, okay, how is this going to look? What's your timeframe? So your brain is already i mean doing that that piece of critical thinking. um So it can apply anywhere in life. It doesn't have to be just your profession.
43:22.55
Christine Brite
or being a mom or being you know somebody who's a brand new driver. right I think that it can be applied anywhere.
43:27.17
Lorie Jones
yeah
43:32.67
Lorie Jones
So this one, I know the answer is yes, but did you face any unique challenges because you were a woman? Tell us a little bit about that.
43:41.25
Christine Brite
Yes.
43:43.71
Lorie Jones
I knew it was you.
43:46.86
Christine Brite
um Well, women are unique. right We are unique. and who I still face unique challenges as a woman, ah as a even as a police officer, especially as a police officer, right?
44:00.45
Christine Brite
Because we're double, we're taking it doubly where um we walk into a Chick-fil-A and ah the little girl, the little boy are like, look, a police officer.
44:11.83
Christine Brite
And the mom goes, yeah, and it's a female, it's a girl cop too. Like we're some, you know, phenomena you don't see. it We're like the Loch Ness Monster or something.
44:21.65
Lorie Jones
Yeah, special breed.
44:22.56
Christine Brite
um Yeah, and you know, I kind of look at the mom and dad and like, yes, we exist, right? We we have a lot of females now in our profession. So, you know, I mean, that's a ah funny kind of witty example, but I think that there, I mean, there's so many dynamics that we can explore when it comes to being a female and the differences of our male counterparts, you know,
44:51.13
Lorie Jones
here
44:52.63
Christine Brite
in my profession specifically, ah not as a therapist, but as a police officer, you know, I think I've explained a couple of those different ones. Just our size alone, just like uniforms. Can you handle that gun? Do you need a smaller gun? You know, our hands are smaller, so we need different guns. eight You know, I mean, on and on, right? where Our patrol cars, when I get in the patrol car, I'm like laying back, right?
45:21.89
Christine Brite
Um, because but the seat is so far back and I'm like pushing it forward, like, and then they're like, who pushed, push the car seat forward. I'm like me. I'm five, four. I'm sorry.
45:30.98
Lorie Jones
Yeah.
45:31.48
Christine Brite
I'm not six to like you. Um, so, you know, there's, there's a lot of, of that going on. Um, I also feel that in law enforcement and you might, you may,
45:43.97
Christine Brite
hear this from a variety of different careers, but um women are um great communicators. We're very good at communicating, at listening, at um putting in a piece of empathy or sympathy that goes a long way within the the communication factor. And so many times you even see that the my male counterparts, when we're on a scene maybe of a mentally i ill person, they'll ask,
46:14.05
Christine Brite
can can you step in and talk to this person?
46:18.03
Lorie Jones
Mm-hmm.
46:18.33
Christine Brite
um A side note, I'm also a crisis negotiator, um which also is very helpful to, um you know, speak with speak and speak the truth and be able to provide some type of guidance or comfort to whoever is listening.
46:36.78
Christine Brite
And that could mean that that's a nurse, that's a teacher with a a student, um it could be a you name it. So, you know, women in all different capacities have challenges. It's how we overcome those and, again, critically think about how we could use that to our benefit. um So in this case, to my benefit is I can speak to people in ah in a way where I can communicate effectively and be able to listen to them. Now, as a therapist,
47:09.56
Christine Brite
We're kind of opposite. When you think of therapists, you don't really think of like big burly men with tattoos right all over the place.
47:16.73
Lorie Jones
Yeah.
47:17.56
Christine Brite
um You think of women. You think of women therapists. And and so in that re retrospect, you know it's kind of flipped a little bit. So I get to also be that person for someone else.
47:30.88
Christine Brite
So I think it's all in in our minds of how can we use it to benefit ourselves? Not necessarily that it's um a setback. We're just different. And I think that different is good.
47:44.99
Lorie Jones
Yeah. Yeah. There's a lot of different places too. Like I, that's how come I didn't say, um, you know, what that question like, did you, did you face any hardships or something like that?
47:55.53
Lorie Jones
It's just a unique challenge. We're different.
47:57.89
Christine Brite
Yeah.
47:58.07
Lorie Jones
And so I'm just, I'm curious as to like, what sort of challenges do you have because you're different? And I think he spoke to that really well, Christine. I appreciate your, your answer and your thoughtfulness on that one.
48:11.85
Lorie Jones
What is the thing you are most proud of?
48:16.19
Christine Brite
Oh goodness.
48:20.00
Christine Brite
My daughter, definitely my kiddo. um Both of my children, they turned out really well. You never know, you never know, right? You have five kids of your own. You're like, I don't know how this one, is this one gonna stay out of prison or is this one gonna go be beyond the straight and the narrow? I'm not really sure, but um both of my children have been,
48:43.80
Christine Brite
God sent, they've been wonderful kids. They are very much like myself and my husband, which are, you know, they they have great work ethic, they have mostly, most of the time, great critical thinking, awareness, and we're we're going through the self reflection right now, right? Like, how how can I get better? um But um'm I'm proud that first, i I've kept them alive so long. So thank you for that.
49:12.59
Christine Brite
um
49:12.71
Lorie Jones
It's a challenge.
49:14.88
Christine Brite
Exactly. what was It was an accomplishment. um But um knowing just that I created and had a part of forming a human being to be a ah good member of society, someone that is going to be productive and motivated and able to forge forward. That is by far the biggest piece of my life that I can say that that's the greatest accomplishment I've ever had.
49:48.85
Lorie Jones
Yeah.
49:49.32
Christine Brite
And the longest, right? Like it's been a really long, you know, it's a long time.
49:50.85
Lorie Jones
Yeah.
49:53.58
Lorie Jones
yeah yeah And I got news for you. It doesn't end at 17, 18, 19, 20, 25, 55.
50:03.20
Christine Brite
Don't say that.
50:03.47
Lorie Jones
But it's all right. It gets better. And it doesn't it actually I do like that about all my kids is like I enjoyed every piece of their growing up in their development.
50:14.09
Lorie Jones
And it felt like it was a big push to age 18. But you do. you're never You never stop that accomplishment. That that sense of and putting, ah helping to develop a person who's fully in this world and doing good things, that always stays with you too.
50:33.58
Lorie Jones
So, I mean, I've only got a 26 year old, so, so I guess i I don't, I can't speak, but I can say that I've heard, but it doesn't, it doesn't end up going.
50:35.58
Christine Brite
Yeah.
50:43.56
Christine Brite
yeah I heard there are phases, so I don't know what phase I'm in right now, but I'm hoping we get through this phase and go on to the next.
50:52.64
Lorie Jones
Yeah, there were some that I would have, there were some phases I would have been happy to skip, but I probably wouldn't have learned as much. Going back to the idea of like learning from the things that you did, you know, there are times when I, I just messed up some aspect of parenting entirely.
51:10.10
Lorie Jones
And I have to go back.
51:12.88
Christine Brite
Yep.
51:13.17
Lorie Jones
Luckily, I had five to practice on. So by the time I got to number five,
51:19.48
Christine Brite
That is awesome.
51:20.93
Lorie Jones
but So any advice for a young lady who's just starting down this journey that you're already successful at? Anything that you would be able to tell her at the beginning of her journey to help her out?
51:33.50
Christine Brite
Yeah. I would I would start with, you know, one of the questions you asked is just having an open mind, ah being non judgmental, being able to see others perspectives, I think that is really important, just at least even just stepping foot down a pathway that you think that you want to go down. um Don't, don't drill yourself into one way or another, allow yourself to, like I said, have the open mind to think, well, if I go
52:04.41
Christine Brite
If I go left, I could see A, B, and C. If I go right, I can see D, E, and F. And there's nothing wrong with either pathway. I just, being able to be mindful of it and know what your options are. And then when you choose, especially if in in your younger years, you know, teenager, 20s, you choose a pathway and you're walking down this pathway and all of a sudden you hit a big old pothole and you're deep in that pothole, after you get yourself off and you brush yourself off, it's okay to start again. It's okay to go, you know what? That really wasn't my path after all. Let's take another path. I think that the, you know, the world is your oyster kind of quote is so true. I i wish I would have known that a little bit deeper when I was younger, um because, you know, you're not just drilled into one path.
53:01.97
Christine Brite
You can have multiple paths. um You just have to find one that you enjoy, you are going to um fulfill your heart, fulfill your mind. And it doesn't matter what everybody else thinks about it. It's what you think about it. So move down that pathway as you see fit. um you know Again, my daughter's getting ready to go into college and she says, well, mom, I think she chose like three or four different paths. She was like, I want to do A, B, and C. and i'm like wow, that's they're a lot different.
53:34.47
Christine Brite
She wanted to be a detective. She wanted to go to the Navy. She wanted to be a psychologist. Weird, right?
53:40.20
Lorie Jones
and Yeah.
53:40.92
Christine Brite
And I'm like, OK, well, let's narrow this down. And and that's OK. I said, it's OK that you don't know right now. That is completely OK. You are right where you need to be.
53:51.54
Christine Brite
And that is what's important for young women to know. And even us as adults, we are exactly where we need to be. um And we're going to continue to find our pathways through life. And it it could be a right. It could be a left. or You can just forge straight ahead. And there's no wrong answer.
54:12.28
Lorie Jones
you And I like the idea that you're talking about where you can go back and change course. Like you take the right path and it just doesn't fit you, but you didn't know that.
54:19.17
Christine Brite
Yeah.
54:23.32
Lorie Jones
So you turn around and go back or take a crossroads and get back to where you're supposed to be.
54:23.72
Christine Brite
yeah
54:28.45
Lorie Jones
um and there's And there's no problem in that. like you know like there's no There's no judgment or anything about this path didn't fit you quite right.
54:40.68
Lorie Jones
Do another one. They're equally fine.
54:42.56
Christine Brite
Absolutely.
54:44.02
Lorie Jones
Yeah.
54:44.49
Christine Brite
Absolutely. And, you know, another piece of that is um find support people. Find somebody who is going to support you on this journey, aye whether that be a family member or someone on the outside, a mentor at work, whatever that might look like, a teacher, somebody that just going to be right next to you.
55:05.05
Christine Brite
So when you do fall in that pothole, or if you get over a speed bump, you can say, hey, this happened to me, what should I do? Because Honestly, nobody knows how to go through life.
55:17.30
Christine Brite
We're swimming through life, kind of just winging it for the most part, right? And so rely on your your peers, rely on your people that support you to get through this journey.
55:22.79
Lorie Jones
Yeah.
55:30.31
Christine Brite
That is also very important.
55:33.19
Lorie Jones
Yeah, and I think several. Like don't, make sure you don't just have one. You've got a lot that you can turn to and say, gosh, I'm having a rough day. Let me tell you what happened. And, and I have a mom and a daughter that I'll go and say, oh gosh, I just had a rough day. And one of them tells me I'm wonderful and the other one hugs me. And it's just, it's amazing.
55:57.26
Lorie Jones
It's just really is helpful.
55:58.08
Christine Brite
Yep.
55:58.70
Lorie Jones
So I would 100% agree with that. Find your tribe, find your people because you need them. This is a long journey and you're going to need all the support that you can get, right?
56:12.52
Christine Brite
Absolutely.
56:12.68
Lorie Jones
Thank you so much.
56:13.69
Christine Brite
Totally agree.
56:15.00
Lorie Jones
Yeah, thank you so much, Christine, for joining us and sharing your story. I really appreciate hearing it. If I have young listeners that want to get in contact with you and ask them questions or pick your brain, how did they do that?
56:31.77
Christine Brite
Yes, um I am, um email is probably the best just because I am a little busy, but email me, my email address is cbright, b-r-i-t-e-1-1-0-1 at gmail dot.com. um They just want to drop me a line and we can chat anytime. I will ah well certainly get back to you.
56:58.39
Lorie Jones
Well, I appreciate you taking the time and and sharing your journey. it was It's really unique and i I'm so excited to have gotten to know you a little bit better too. So thank you so much. I appreciate it.
57:11.46
Christine Brite
You're welcome. Thank you Lori for having me. It has been an honor.