By Lorie Jones, Fearless Financial Advisors
A few years ago, a client sat across from me and said something I’ll never forget:
“I make good money. I save. I do all the ‘right’ things. So why does my financial life feel so… empty?”
We dug into her situation. On paper, she was doing great. Maxing out her retirement accounts. Living below her means. Building an impressive net worth.
But when we looked deeper, a pattern emerged: she’d been following a financial playbook that wasn’t hers. The goals she was working toward? They were inherited from her parents’ expectations, from financial advice gurus, from what she thought she should want.
She was optimizing for a life she didn’t actually want to live.
Money as a Tool, Not a Goal
Here’s what I believe at my core: Money is a tool. And tools should build the life YOU actually want.
Not the life your parents wanted for you. Not the life Instagram influencers are selling. Not the life that looks impressive from the outside. YOUR life. Based on YOUR values.
This sounds obvious, but it’s surprisingly rare. Most of us have never stopped to ask: What do I actually value? And is my money working toward those values?
What Values-Aligned Finance Looks Like
Values-aligned finance is different for everyone. There’s no one-size-fits-all answer. But here are some examples of what it might mean:
If you value family time: Maybe that means prioritizing flexibility over maximum income, or saving for experiences rather than things.
If you value social impact: Maybe that means investing in companies whose practices align with your beliefs, or building charitable giving into your budget as a non-negotiable.
If you value creativity and purpose: Maybe that means building a retirement vision that includes meaningful work, not just relaxation.
If you value security and peace of mind: Maybe that means a larger emergency fund than the “experts” recommend, because sleeping well at night is worth it to you.
The point isn’t to follow someone else’s rules. It’s to create your own.
The Values Clarification Exercise
This month, I want you to try a simple exercise. Grab a piece of paper and answer these questions:
1. What are the three things that matter most to me in life? (Be honest—not what should matter, what actually does.)
2. Looking at my spending over the past month, does it reflect those values?
3. What’s one financial decision I’ve made recently that felt really right? What made it feel that way?
4. What’s one financial “rule” I’ve been following that doesn’t actually serve me?
There are no right answers here. The goal is just to create some awareness around the gap between what you value and where your money actually goes.
Permission to Do It Differently
I want to give you permission (if you need it) to do things differently than the standard advice suggests.
It’s okay to spend more on things that bring you genuine joy, even if others wouldn’t understand.
It’s okay to invest in alignment with your values, even if it means slightly different returns.
It’s okay to define retirement on your own terms.
It’s okay to say “no” to financial choices that feel wrong in your gut, even if they make sense on paper.
Your financial life should serve you, not the other way around.
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